identity complex.

Im feeling guilty. I don’t “want” to be more Arab than American. I don’t have to want this, or try to do this, because I am both. I was born in the US. I am still Arab. Patriotism in fact does demand subordinance when the country you are supposed to pledge your allegiance to was built on a foundation of white European supremacy. Acceptance in American society has always depended on full assimilation at the expense of immigrants and resulting in the loss of culture. I’m confused as to why the loss of culture and so many of the things that make people special and different could be seen as a good thing; even American mythology (not necessarily practice) says that our nation is great because of all these diverse and beautiful cultural influences.

To be Vegan or not to be.. that is the question!

I Have spend months trying to figure out what caused my constant stomach bloating and nausea. You know if i actually listen to my body, I am sure I will know what's wrong. I know dairy bothers my stomach but I refuse to listen. I always had an extremely sensitive stomach and I constantly have stomachaches. I know if I can go vegan my problems will vanish. I know most my problems come ffrom the poor food im allowing to enter into my body. I just can't seem to listen and go vegan. Why? I feel as though I will be so limited and I cant help but crave cheese and chocolate?.. what to do?

Ive been wanting to read The kind diet but i've been putting it off.. Im unsure wy.. i think it's time i pick up that book. Let you know how it goes!

inspiration

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j0HfwkArpvU&feature=player_embedded

Ramadan Kareem

Ramadan is a time to get together with family, socialize, meditate, etc... but I want to use it as an opportunity to really experience Egypt. So I convinced my parents there is noway i can leave Cairo without experiencing Ramadan here.

So today is the first day of Ramadan, there are decorations up and something tells me people are going to be even more nice than they already are and definitely more hungrier, so would that mean grumpier instead? shoot- although that could just be part of my imagination. The clocks went back an hour last night which means that people can break their fast a little earlier in the evening. Im very confused by this because when i asked they said so people can break their fast earlier-it’s all just a mind game, no? we break our fasts according to sunset not a certain time. Anyway, just imagine Cairo’s heat, working outdoors, and fasting. My gosh, this has got to be the worst time of year to have Ramadan. As for me, i’m extremely fortunate to have A/C in the apartment, sleep until the late afternoon and wake up a couple hours before iftar. Ah the easy way out. For me, fasting today isn’t any more different than last week. it actually doesn’t make a huge amount of difference at all because I am so used to not really having food in the fridge and forced to eat once a day anyway. Alhamdulilah.

Unfortunately, many are forced to start their day very early in the morning, forced to work outdoors in Cairo's strong heat, to make just about enough money to feed their families. I feel a lot of sympathy for them. The construction workers, the garbage men, the taxi drivers,and the beggars. This is why I will be starting to packing up food for them. A couple of friends and I are going to gather during the weekends to pack up food and pass around for the poor. Inshallah.

GRAPES

At work, we didn't have much lunch options...As a matter of fact, we only had one option and it was Metro SuperMarket, ofcourse the most expensive supermarket in town. Anyway, one afternoon, i decided I will be having Grapes for lunch. I came across two kinds. One significantly cheaper than the other. They looked more like american grapes since they were HUGE and when I say HUGE i really mean H-U-G-E. They defenitely have all the chemicals in the world, but since im on a budget I had no choice but to buy the 6 L.E. Grapes. instead of the 11.l.e. Guess who was in bed later that evening sick to her stomach? You got it. ME!. Those grapes tore my stomach up. I must’ve not washed them right or something. Ah i wish i haden’t eaten them i thought. But comon it’s the summer. and thats when the grapes become available, as well as strawberries,

The best job an American can get in Cairo...... TEACHER!!

For countless Americans, nothing would be more thrilling than for the opportunity to live and be able to work abroad. Indeed, upon graduation, I had the opportunity to experience a new culture, travel, and simply learn and discover. My 7th month in, I was able to land a job abroad.

Teaching English offers us young wanders the opportunity to live the life we want. I got really lucky because this job came to me. I was recruited to be an English Teacher for a camp by YDC at Kattameya Heights. I had no idea what i was in for. The interview went something like this... Phone rings.. Caller ID says “Shaymaa” ME: Hey there! SHAYMAA: Hey rooj, what are you doing tomorrow? ME: mmm u know..absolutely nothing.. SHAYMAA : Ok meet me tomorrow at downtown at 7:15 am. Me: Ok?... Shaymaa: I have a job for u. Me: Perfect I’ll be there!.. Suddenly she passes the phone to a lady named, Mona, who by the way turns out to be an important lady working for the company, she tells me to meet her at a different location. The next morning, I do just that. 7:15 AM I am waiting for what i thought would be a yellow school bus to pick me up. 8:00am and no sign of a yellow school bus. I must've missed it I thought. 8:25, A white microbus pulls up and says hop in! I ride and mind you at this point I am still clueless as all hell. I am not sure how but somehow I knew I would be working in what would be considered a camp enviorment so i wore my Khakhis and a red tshirt. I go in and I introduce myself to the rest of the gang and get introduced to Mona, the executive director, who i spoke to earlier. After two hours, things are so hectic so the program manager, Ellen didn't get a chance to fill me in on everything except that days duty. I ended up teaching that same day. Completely unprepared, I had no choice but to ignore my stomach rumbles and acted like i knew what I was doing . Although i had no idea how to teach or how to even approach the kids I pretended to know. I was given the material and jumped right in and taught. My stomach continued to rumble but ignored. I was teaching 2 classes in one camp and 3 classes in another. The other camp program is called SMASH. The teacher before me ended up quitting because of the kids in that program. My kids were all very spoiled, loud and did not listen. It was the summer and I had 40 kids in some of my classes. Getting them to focus almost seemed impossible. Just imagine a bunch of 3-17 year old rich kids, who came into camp eating chocolate, for snack ate chocolate, after lunch ate chocolate and after camp ate chocolate. Sugar high 247. Unhealthy and hyper. Not a great mix while trying to teach and of course you cannot forbid them because god forbid these were rich kids who ruled over you! My gosh, I would love to be able to see how unhealthy these kids grow up to be. Egyptian culture is all about chocolate! Looking back, it was all very fun. Although, I shouldn’t have been so nervous I can understand why I was, since I had no prior experience I lacked belief and confidence.